So, how do your treat yourself?
Do you give yourself permission to take little shots at yourself? I’m such a dingbat. I’m a knucklehead. Do you give yourself license to really unload on yourself? I’m such a loser. I’m a moron.
I used to do both of those things with regularity. I would really let me have it.
There is a name I used to call myself. Whenever I met with failure or personal disappointment, I would call myself an “intelligent idiot.” I reasoned that I was a gifted individual who had ample opportunity to succeed, but I failed anyway. This was more than harsh self-criticism. This was self-contempt.
And I had no business talking to myself that way. Every one of us has been made in the image of our Maker. That means every one of us is due honor, respect and love. That applies to me.
My wife had no idea that I talked to myself that way because it was my private nickname. I kept it safe; and that left me vulnerable. The enemy likes to work inside our heads where we’re isolated. He likes to speak insults in the 1st person. He loves self-hatred.
Once, at a low point, I drew a cartoon of a not-so-super hero, called Captain Futility. My wife told me to knock it off. She was right.
By insulting ourselves and lying about ourselves, we diminish ourselves. And we end up with less of ourselves to offer those who rely on us.
And we grieve God’s heart.
I don’t give myself permission to mistreat myself anymore. I won’t allow it. In my case, I had to find the root of my self-contempt and deal with that heart issue. Now I guard against picking up that old, bad habit.
How about you?